Hi everyone

I am wanting to know whether Italian men have respect for women in general other than their mother/girlfriend or wife?

I have met some Italian men here in the UK, working with them and I have found that they do not seem to have an ounce of respect for women. I want to know if it is because they work here in the UK and they see English women as cheap meat or is it the same in Italy?

I have been to Italy many times and have not seen this disrespect, but to be fair I have not worked with men in Italy.

I would like your views on this please.

Regards

Sophia

Well, the biggest love and respect is for the "Mamma" and for a sister. As for the women in general goes it is usually the woman who they are interested in at that particular moment. It is all about the chase.
In Italy I've seen big disrespect to the wife's, long time girlfriends even as they were present, not to mention when they were not.

It depends on what you mean for lack of respect.
Italians are very straight in the sexual approach, we don't necessarly consider it a lack of respect for women. I think we show respect in some other ways: if you feel sick in the street be sure that many men will offer you their help; if a man beats you, many men will come in your help; etc.
Anyway, this last years the number of rapes, abuses on women and murders arose very much in Italy, it means that behaviors of Italian men have been changing somehow. We could make a long discussion about the reasons.....

Sophia1 : I do think it depends on the person more than on the culture - It has to be considered by case to case - In my opinion however Italian men as an average do respect women. I do not think there is anywhere the concept that the woman should not be entitled to all the rights that a men have ( if that is what you mean ) .
In any case in which contents they where disrepectful ??

Tanecnice : I do not agree at all however ..Yes of course there is the chase after women but that is the fun part ...it is not why Italian men disrespect women.

Hi

To all who have posted on this thread!(thank you) and just to clarify I am not talking about the "chase" as I am aware of how crazy men can be but thats another story.

I am talking about not having respect for women in general, as in if I were an Italian man I would have respect immediately. Do Italian men feel threatened by an independent woman? and possibly have more respect for me if I were cooking in the home constantly and having lots of bambinos at my feet?

I am asking the question as I have never come across this ever before, this is something that has happened just recently (IN THE UK)

As for me I do not go around wearing short skirts or say anything that should offend these men, only that I stand up for myself. They insist on calling me "Sophie" when my name is Sophia I have mentioned this on numerous occasions yet they ignore me and state they prefer Sophie, there is more but I do not wish to "bitch" on about it. I am just curious to know why they act this way.

Regards

Sophia

Hi Sophia,
It sounds like you are the target of adult bullying. Unfortunately, this type of abhorrent social behavior criss-crosses gender and cultural lines. Adult bullying has many forms but usually one purpose: To harrass, put down, and/or to demoralize the person being bullied. In short, they want to "shut you down" emotionally and mentally - to make you feel ineffective so that you will be.

Bullying can be anything from nasty comments or dirty looks to interrupting, ignoring someone in conversation, and sometimes physical abuse (such as shoving or pushing-then saying it was not intentional). EXCELLENT article titled "How to Stand Up To Grown-Up Bullies" www.BottomLineSecrets.com by Jane Middelton-Moz, MS. January 1, 2004. I keep a copy of this article in my desk at work (past victim of bullying in the workplace here !) and refer to it often. The article was written by a clinical psychologist who is the director of the Middleton-Moz Institute for Consultation, Intervention, and Training,(in Montpelier, Vermont www.ippi.org) which advises corporations, schools and organizations on anger management and harassment issues. The article further addresses how to seek support, make allies, and effectively diffuse adult bullies.

My question to you is: What is the bully (s) vested interest in you? You are an attorney, yes? Are these particular people on the other team or involved with opposing counsel ?

My best advice to you is: Do NOT let these people get inside your head. Trust your instincts ! You are not alone. There are resources to help you deal with this situation.

Please let me know how this turns out, Sophia! I am on your team 100% !!
Esther

Please read this thread and look at the attached image - A real cut out from a 1955 American news paper -
http://my.lifeinitaly.com/f18/the-pe...he-1950s-t534/
My guess is that this people left for the UK much before in Italy things changed drastically...
Lot of bambino running around ? Italy has only 1.3 child per caput - One of the lowest in the world ... I personally prefer strong women - For example my first girlfriend was an engineer and she is now a Director at Good-year - A few of my ex-girlfriend have excellent jobs, making much more money than I, and my wife as well is making a much more money than I do - I have no problem with that !

As I was explaining to Sophia in the chat.

I believe its a simple case of people not respecting others because of a lack of self confidence. I get that often in my workplace. For me, since i am young, i'm sure that has something to do with it as well. I just don't think in sophia's case it has anything to do with nationality. People are going to be ignorant wherever you go, its just a fact of life....especially in the business world. I don't like it, and wish it wasnt that way, but it is what it is. You just have to learn to look past it, pick your head up and remember that you are where you are because you obviously are fit for the situation, they are just jealous.

Paolo

I read the article from the 1955 clipping in absolute disbelief, thank you for enlightening me and I can honestly say I am thankful that I was not born back then

Very interesting! Grazie Villa.