Unfortunately or fortunately they usually dont take no for an answer, and being married isnt really considered on either one's side. Its too bad your wife fell for it, and I hope it was worth it. I know married Italians that continue to pursue other women right in the same small town that they live in with wives mind you and kids, no shame, no conscious. I don't fully inderstand this type of thinking, as I am american and not Italian...but I can be your witness to these situtations.

I'd really love to hear an Italian guy's perspective on this. Putting to one side my own situation for a moment, that kind of thing has always just struck me as a bit......wrong. Or am I just being old fashioned?

I recently experienced the charm of an ITALIAN MAN. I met him online, and we spent over a year Tx messaging,emails and phone calling. Boy!!! he was good with sweet words and making castle in the air. I felt for it like a jerk (LOL) ...and I ended it up getting hurt. The promises he made, a womanizer bigger than the famous casanova but he was just words and no action. I think he was suffering from insecurities. As a man, he needed to feel more than a macho man by telling lies and making promises he knew he was not able to deliver. But Thanks God ...it over. At time I still remember him and then I laughed.

I wonder what is the usual age when italian men get married. I am sure they never get married at 20. They like to be free so much!
I'd like to know your opinion.

It depends but it's not easy that italian couples get married before 25 years old. Anyway it's not only due to freedom desire but to economic situation in the Country. You have no money to buy a house , no money to have children, no definitive job....

Stellina, thank you for your reply, I never thought of it earlier. I really believed that italian men don't get married early because they don't need a wife until their mothers take care of them, that they feel very well living with the family.
But I don't understand when I meet a 35-40 year old man and he isn't married (and sometimes has never been), at this age he has a flat, good education, job, car, money...

Well i have an italian boyfriend now for 1,5 year and i am very happy
with him, he is nothing like the stories i read/heard before.
Maybe there is also an difference from where they come from?
My boyfriend is from the north, i met alot of his friends family etc, but i dont find them the machotypes...

Ciao a tutti!

Fun to see this thread is still going! I haven't read it in a while....

Monkey Boy, I am sorry to hear your wife ended up leaving with the Italian. That really sucks!

I'll be curious to see what Italian men say when/if they respond.

I hope you don't blame all Italians for it, though. Better to blame any man who would pursue a married woman in the first place. I know it happens all the time, and I think the worst part of any of that is not so much when a man makes the first move but when he continues to push when a woman says no.

As for marriage and Italian men, I also think it's more about the economy than other things. It is VERY expensive in Italy and for a young couple it's almost impossible to buy anything they need.

I don't know about the un-married older Italian men, though... that doesn't bother me. If it's because they want to be playboys, that's the way they are and at least they aren't married and still playing... !? I think that's a good thing.

And on a more personal note, the Italian men I know and am enjoying getting to know better ALWAYS flirt. It's just the nature of the game. I flirt back or I don't, depending on circumstances, the conversation, my mood, the man... we all have a choice and that's really what it's all about.

And even MORE personally... I haven't been to Italy now in 13 months and I am missing the whole Italian attitude all the way around. I miss the flirting, the harmless (or not so harmless, and that's the fun!) offers of a glass of wine or a cup of coffee, the flower handed to me at Trevi Fountain by a man I'd never seen before, and the smiles that accompany me down the street.

Can't wait to go back!

Teresa

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I am not going to disagree with you Jacqueline because what you are saying rings true to me too. But I still find them charming and attentive (whether it is sincere or not is another thing) but it is certainly flattering. I think the problems I had had more to do with culture (ie never being on time) and the use of cell phones to make plans (instead of just setting a time and sticking to it). Oh, but they dress well and I appreciate that. I guess I would just always wonder if they can be loyal. They do seem to show a preference for North America woman (even though Italian woman are very sensual). What is that all about? I don't really understand the way they act but I do find them attractive. They are very aware of appearance, much more so than North Americans I think, and they need more ego stroking too, I think. Not a bad thing, just something that I found interesting.

Interesting!

My girlfriend is Italian (she lives there) and has said the same thing.